The Truth shall set you back a couple bucks.

That cracked me up when I thought of it. Anyway, on to truths behind my creative writing.

1. Before I was married, I dropped a desk onto my left hand, but was saved by the presence of my engagement ring.
->True. While Em was not terribly interested in me getting her an engagement ring, I thought it only fair and fitting that we both be marked as 'set apart' in the interim before the wedding. Plus, I looked good in that ring.

2. I am descended from a long line of literary critics and philosophers. Also a pop art painter.
->False. Although Google pulls these guys up, I am not directly (or distantly) related to them. That I know of.

3. I was referred to on a recent library survey as "Old guy with earrings."
->True. sigh However, they also said I was very helpful and deserved a raise. Sweet!

4. In 9th grade, I ruined a vacuum cleaner with cigarette smoke.
->True. I tested the efficacy of cigarette filters by drawing cigarette smoke of different brands of filtered and non-filtered death sticks through coffee filters in a jerry-rigged funnel attached to the hose. From then on, the house smelled like a bar whenever Mom vacuumed.

5. I always went to bed on time while growing up.
->False. Night Owl. This guy.

6. I think beer is the milk of the gods.
->False. I think beer tastes like pee. Sick cat pee. But maybe I just haven't found my match.

7. My father drove my mother 90 miles south so that I could be born.
->True. We lived in a small Texas "town" of ~1500 folks. 90 miles south was reliable medical care. Ergo, I love road trips.

There she is, folks.
Truths: 4
Falsehoods: 3
Fair and balanced. Right?
--
Ps. I wore the mustache to work on Monday. Interesting observations and some truth telling from my lovely wife.

4:07 PM me: turns out no one wants to be your friend when you have a mustache

:(

4:08 PM Everyone is rude when they come to the desk

I guess the age of the mustache has passed us by

Em: it is because you look creepy